Envy is a natural feeling that everyone has. The problem arises when you become constantly envious. Find out why this happens and how to make envy positive for you.
Envy always hides people’s longing to be better. Despite its many forms and the ways envy is presented to you, the reality is that it is normal to feel it in many situations. However, when envy is pathological and you feel it on many occasions, it can cause problems for your life.
What is envy?
You could define the meaning of envy as a feeling that causes a certain discomfort in front of the achievements, the successes of other people. Therefore, when you encounter an envious person or a well-wisher, he feels displeasure or annoyance caused by the well-being of someone else.
Although many times envious people are perceived with bad eyes, the reality is that everyone experiences this kind of feeling. The difference between an envious person and someone who, despite being envious, is not, lies in his attitude towards him. According to the reaction to this feeling, psychologists distinguish two types of envy.
Negative envy
In negative envy you find the most fortified attitude of the envious. The main signs of envy that this type of person demonstrates is the desire for what others have.
So much so that envious people are deeply angry that the other person has what he desires. Example: When you watch someone who looks happy, under whatever circumstances, but his internal forum is not, the only thing he is looking for is a way to disturb you, so that you feel bad and thus balance the two parts .
With this posture of negative envy, this discomfort is felt in this moment, but the envious one is not comforted by his disappointment because the other feels bad, because when this moment of triumph ends, the successful one will continue to be so despite the minimum bad time.
On the other hand, the envious will feel victory at this point, but they will also remain bitter and achieve only a small battle in their personal war. All this without realizing that this negative envy only increases their confidence and self-respect.
Positive envy
The second way, close to the feeling of envy, is less common, but ends with a personal battle of the envious person. So much so that in such envy the envious one asks: “Hey, if he succeeded, why can’t I get it?”.
Therefore, a person who feels envious begins to appreciate that he is the same as others and that he can also achieve this. In this type of envy, envy is transformed into a positive feeling that allows personal evolution. In positive envy, the optics change to create feelings. Negative from the envious become creative both for others and for themselves.
Why are you jealous?
Some of the things that cause you to perceive envy as negative rather than positive include:
Low self-esteem. People with low self-esteem tend to compare themselves to others and envy their immediate environment. The reason is not that they are bad people, but that they just have a very negative thought towards themselves, which causes them to always lose in all the comparisons they make.
Low motivation. When people feel little motivation to achieve their goals, they end up becoming very envious. The reason is that conformity, when it is too present, does not let you out of your comfort zone and this eventually takes its toll on you.
Narcissistic people. People with a narcissistic personality always want to feel better than others. This feeling makes envy more present in their lives than in most cases.
While these are the most common causes of envy, the reality is that envy can arise for many other reasons. In each of these cases, it is important to detect it in time and turn it into a positive feeling in order to achieve each of our goals and objectives.
The difference between jealousy and envy
There are many cases where envy is confused with jealousy. On the one hand, it can be said that envy of others makes you want to acquire something that the other person possesses, be it a virtue or a physical object.
On the other hand, when you refer to jealousy, you emphasize the fear of losing what you already have in advance. So when you talk about a jealous person, you are referring to the feeling you get in the face of personal competition to keep or restore what you think is yours.
How to overcome envy?
If you think you are an envious person and you are part of the envious people who feel this feeling in a negative way, there are some formulas so that you can use all this energy for your own personal benefit.
1. Be grateful for what you have
Sometimes you are not aware of all that you have, and therefore you feel jealous. Thus, a good way to leave the feeling of envy behind is to try to be grateful for everything that surrounds you. To achieve this, it is important every day to appreciate who you are and what you have achieved through your efforts. This exercise will not only make you leave behind the envy of others, but will also allow you to increase your self-esteem.
2. Analyze your jealousy
When you’re jealous, it’s for a reason. Therefore, it is important to analyze your envy in order to see the reason for this. Thus, the best way to learn how to overcome jealousy is precisely by achieving the goals or objectives that make you suffer from it.
3. Act positive
In many cases, feelings of envy lead to a brain that ends up full of repetitive and negative thoughts. For this reason, it is vital to try to put aside this harmful attitude and train yourself to think positively.
4. Meditate or exercise
Exercise or meditation allows you to better analyze each of your thoughts. For this reason, if you think you have become a very envious person, this may be a good time to focus on leading a healthier lifestyle. While at first glance it doesn’t seem like it has much to do with this feeling, the reality is that practicing both meditation and sports will improve your ability to control your mind.
5. Go see a psychologist
You go to the gym to improve on the outside, but you still don’t have the habit of calling a psychologist when you want to improve on the inside. Counting on the help of a mental health professional will not only be ideal for burying envy or turning it into something positive for you, but you can also improve in all other aspects of your personality.
